One thing that my closest friends note is how I'm generally happy, and most of the time, I am. However, can I tell you a secret? I have crippling anxiety and real bad depression, meaning that art is as much fun for me as it is a release and a means of communicating that which I often can't through words or writing.
As a perfectionist, my love of my own artwork is in constant flux. One minute, I'll latch onto a particular piece and be ever so proud. Other time? I'll throw a punch through it, or not pick up a brush in several weeks for fear of 'messing up.'
I look at the work of my idols, and I wish I could paint with as much finesse and vigour. But then I realise something, and that something is probably as valuable to you as it is to me.
I'm 19! I'm still a teenager! I have time to improve, especially when you consider these artists are middle-aged or older. Thats decades more experience, and experiences than I have to inform my work process. Whilst my work is often identifiable, I am still in a state of exploration, and testing, and that is incredibly exciting. Like...really exciting.
I need to stop comparing myself to others, and carry on doing what many people strive to do for a lifetime and never achieve; make and propagate art and good messages.
Jack, March 2017